Why I Quit OnlyFans
I always thought that if you are lucky enough to have found something that you really like doing, something that you’re passionate about something you’re willing to dedicate your life to, you are one lucky human being. and if you take that and transform it into a business you are both lucky and freaking awesome.
As strange as it may sound for some of you I do love my work with all my heart. I love being part of the online SW industry, I love what I’m doing and my little community; I consider myself lucky to be able to do what I love and live in this fascinating world of exploring sexuality.
But what I didn’t know is that.. you know… that, that love and passion what will help me thrive will also blur the lines between personal life and work-life and trust me when you find that one thing that you really are willing to focus and dedicate on it’s hard to say no to it. Is hard to decline work.
And that’s what happened when I found the camming world over a decade ago, or when I started to create content half a year ago. I was grinding because I had to (believe me nothing I ever started was successful at the first trial) but eventually I was doing it because I thought I had to. Because while I knew I have a choice I didn’t feel like I had one. I had to be everywhere where other performers are, I had to do what everybody is doing. I kid you not the fear of missing out is a MOFO
I uploaded my first video on OnlyFans roughly 6 months ago.
When I created my OnlyFans account, to be honest, I didn’t have a vision for it or a grand plan. To my shame, I had no idea where it was going to take me. I made it because everyone kept asking me what is my only fans.. I know It doesn’t make any sense. But, I have a certain degree of fame in the industry, guys came rolling in and at that time I took it as another challenge.
The good: with my new Twitter becoming increasingly more popular and with a good amount of guys knowing me from other platforms things started to look shiny for me. And of course, the financial perk of OnlyFans paying a bigger cut than camming platforms would give.
The bad: Covid pandemic has already started, I was in partial lockdown that changed into a full lockdown that not only put a lot more stress on my vanilla job but also cut me out of all my social life I plunged into a content creation galore only to find out I wasn’t niched enough.
You see all my experience in the virtual sex work industry is in the Anything goes/ Girl Alone category; which means I offer a larger category of shows and for caming that’s awesome, but.. for OnlyFans that’s not that good because everyone will join basically expecting to see 80-90% of content on his liking. And when you have this big amount of guys and two-thirds want a different kind of content from you the stress is going to hit it. Add to it the likes and comment count and now things get even more stressful.
Fast forward a couple of months and around Christmas, I was drowned in work and I frenetically started to create out of stress and anxiety. That’s not good, not good at all anxiety and creativity doesn’t go good together!
So, at this point, my life was work and sleep. Cam 4 days a week, create videos two days a week, one day make pictures and editing. In between doing these, I was taking calls ( i do quite a bit of phone sex and sexting) I was running my OnlyFans page and my social media.. and yes going to work because hey I have a part-time job I didn’t quit. And yah house chores, pets, family.
My life was an all-out sprint and I didn’t see much progress and then I would say it was about two months into it that I completely crashed. I got sick.
But I’m Britney dammit and I don’t do vulnerability well, and client/ custom work and that’s where shit got really serious. Now I’m in bed sick AF, having a friend over to help me even shower because I couldn’t stand on my feet and all I can think about is deadlines, clips I haven’t filmed, stuff I haven’t uploaded on Onlyfans, people getting upset for the lack of updates… Okay… This shit is crazy!
So believe it or not I’m that idiot who jumped from the sickbed and got back to doing 100% of it. I mean I was now working on 150% because I had to catch up LOL
It was only last week when having a coffee with a friend I realized I haven’t done anything fun or anything for myself in more than half a year. That I haven’t read a book or paint or have a decent meal that’s not made from takeaway or leftovers and cola light
But being an online Creator and running your own thing is a bitch, you have all the freedom but you have none at the same time. Once you’ve found a bit of success you think the only way to keep it is to continue to work your face off. You either work your ass off or you lose momentum there are no in-betweens! And yes, it is true! But I was super fucking tired…I wouldn’t say at this point I am pretty close to burning out but I was definitely heading in that direction as I look back over the past six months when my OnlyFans got a good amount of growth.
But I heard the clock ticking on my mental wellbeing and all this all-out sprint was never a part of the plan and it takes stepping back and looking at the big picture to realize that I can slow down. This doesn’t mean that I need to stop caring about the work but it means I need to understand that there are things that aren’t worth sacrificing like my health and my sanity… I realize now that I have a finite amount of time and I CANT do it all. I need to give myself some space.
I need to take off things from my plate and aim for a more balanced life to be able to have autonomy and freedom and hopefully stop myself from becoming my own worst boss. I owe that to myself or I’m going to burn out and I’m not going to be able to maintain any amount of consistency in my work. I already can’t.. that’s that
So ladies and gents that’s my (awfully long) story on why did I quit OnlyFans, or at least the VIP page.
But that being said , I want to thank you for reading my story and to the current OnlyFans subscribers thank you for understanding
